5 ways to create meaningful relationships as a new headteacher

“As a leader, we have an opportunity to build a really special place and a really special culture and we do that through human connection and relationships.”

Forming meaningful, lasting relationships with staff, pupils and parents is an essential part of being a successful school leader. However, it isn’t always easy to prioritise making these connections when the day-to-day running of a school demands so much of your attention.

You may be new to the role of headteacher in a familiar setting, starting as a headteacher in a new setting, or looking to establish impactful relationships at the start of the new school year.

So, how can you create these meaningful relationships in your leadership role?

Exercise self-awareness

Be aware of your own emotions and consider how you present yourself to others. You are the captain of your ship so it’s important to remain composed and practice ‘fake calm’. Checking in with your emotions and composing a response to situations enables you to stay more solution-focused.

The school community are looking to you – your actions and reactions will be noticed and form part of the lasting impression you have on those around you.

Be visible

To everyone. All stakeholders need to see you and feel your presence. This builds trust, emphasises your awareness of the setting and all the people in it, and reassures staff, pupils and parents/carers.

Consider when and where it’s most important to be visible. Are there times during the school day or particular areas around the school where your presence could offer support or calm?

Make time

As far as possible, be generous with your time. Make time to be on the playground at the start and end of the day. Make time to check in with staff throughout the school day. Show you have time to listen.

Be an active listener

Stakeholders need to know that you are listening and that you care. Listening with empathy shows you support them, have their best interests at heart and want to learn in order to move forward in the best way possible.

An active listener follows up communications with questions, allowing for a deeper understanding of others’ viewpoints. And it’s OK to make notes while listening – it shows you intend to digest the points raised and take the appropriate action.

Develop a ‘be kind’ culture

Lead by example and take the whole school community on a journey with you. Your words and actions can demonstrate support, care and understanding. Developing human connections is so important and can be done through even the smallest of gestures, such as holding a door open for a colleague, offering them a cup of tea, and asking them how their journey to school was.

A well-being gift basket left on a colleague’s desk is a beautiful gesture but it will never be a replacement for human connection and interaction.

“To embed real, solid, outstanding, professional practices and systems, you need to have people on your side and you do that through building relationships.”

Suzanne Bate has over 20 years of experience in education, nine of those in leadership roles, and is a former headteacher. Suzanne now provides career development and leadership coaching.